For the longest time I loved my country for two reasons – our
freedom and the way we co-exist peacefully despite our varied differences. I
took pride in the fact that our country has so many different people yet we
kept our prejudices mostly to ourselves and loved our neighbours whole-heartedly. There was
discrimination but in most cases we were not open about it and dealt with it in the most elegant manner. I thought we were
progressing and that the discrimination in our minds was lessoning as well.
And then came the Supreme Court ruling that states homosexuals
to be criminals in the eyes of law unless decided otherwise by the parliament.
Hopefully this absurd ruling will be revoked and Supreme
Court will decide in the favour of Gay community. Hopefully this will not go to
our lethargic parliament who will keep the bill for 20 years only to pass it
back to the Supreme Court. Hopefully we will move forward but for now, we’ve become a
nation of archaic beliefs and I undoubtedly don’t want to be a part of a society that follows a regressive school of thought.
Really, who are we to judge? Each one of us has qualities that make
us different than the other. What is right for you might be wrong for me. Does
that make you a criminal in my eyes? A person who goes against the rules of
society is as it is fighting a hard battle. If the law of the state doesn’t stand
by him, how will he stand up for himself? And if he cannot come out in the open
based on the fact that he/she will be called a criminal if he does, do you realise the
increase in the number of suicide cases? So many would get married out of
societal pressure and then cheat on their spouses because their natural desires
would not be fulfilled. Even more will end up having children and then breaking
their family in due course of time because their relationship will not be as it
should be.
A few years back I told a friend that I might not have
children. She fumed and asked me why did I get married in that case? That was
the first time I associated love and marriage with procreation. Before that, I
just wanted to be happy spending the rest of my life with a person I loved. For
me, first came friendship, then emotional attachment followed by physical
attraction. Having children was never a part of the deal, was it? Similar is
the case with people who choose to love the same gender. If being with that
person makes them happy, why bring in biology in it?
Morality and procreation aside, who is the Supreme Court to
call a person unnatural based on consensual sex? What goes on in my bedroom is
none of their business. If gay sex is unnatural, then anal and oral sex should
be deemed unnatural as well. Go ahead, call all of us, heck, yourselves, criminals.
It is sad that the world’s largest democracy’s highest law
making body has failed us. This is clear discrimination which none of us should
support. Straight or gay, it is OUR choice. And we will not let anyone put us
in jail for that.
I totally agree with you. I dont like where we are heading this! Its like going back to stone age!
ReplyDeleteLike I said, it is not about liberal thinking only. It is about our freedom to choose. And no one can stop us from choosing in this land.
DeleteLook at the words used. 'Criminals' it seems.
ReplyDeleteShame on this country, seriously!
Lets have faith till a further verdict come out. In the meantime, lets make our voices heard!
DeleteYes, the entire thing made me disgusted and sad. If the politicians have any sense, they will quickly just do away with this legislature itself.
ReplyDeleteThe politicians were quick to react in favour of freedom to choose. Except one party which I've begun to hate now. Lets hope for the best.
DeleteSome years back the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts, in its landmark judgment went to the extent of permitting gays to marry legally. The court struck down as “unconstitutional" the existing ban on same-sex marriages as limiting of marriages to opposite couples is restrictive of the freedom and equality protected by the constitution. The court held that “barring an individual from the protections, benefits, and obligations of civil marriage solely because that person would marry a person of the same sex” is violative of the Constitution.”Following it some other states in US legalized it. Still there are many states there which have not permitted it.
ReplyDeleteThe people there are vastly divided on this issue with a majority of the population considering this relationship as unnatural and undeserving of equal treatment to straight relationships. While the US courts have generally been liberal in interpreting laws, the road to legalization of same sex marriages has not been smooth. There is a section that believes that judiciary can only interpret the laws and not rewrite them. It belongs to the realm of legislature.
The apex court in our country has thrown the ball to the parliament to amend the laws if it wishes to make same sex marriages legal. As you have rightly pointed out whatever is the legal position, homosexuality is a fact that cannot be wished away and large numbers of same sex couples do live together in India too without any inhibition especially after Delhi court ruling. The total acceptance of same sex relationship and marriage of gays and lesbians as equal to heterogeneous unions in the eyes of law rests with the parliament. The government should take a stand on it keeping in mind the gathering momentum for such relationships and that society is fast changing to a liberal one. The public debate that the ruling has generated and the absence of hushed tone in which this issue is discussed should give a pointer to the way forward
True. Hopefully the parliament will be the bigger person here and accept same sex relationships. Legalizing gay marriage should be the next step. Religious beliefs have time and again been used against progress. They will do that in this case as well. But we will keep raising our voice for equality and not take this discrimination.
DeleteWow... loved your take on the topic. I agree with you 100%.
ReplyDeleteI had posted a few tweets on the same yesterday and somebody asked me, "so, are you not straight? why did you get married then???" even now, i can't stop laughing at that! :)
It is important to debate in a democratic country. But I am sorry, there are some issues that don't have a 'for' and 'against'. These people need to get their facts right. And they need to be gay for a day to understand their feelings.
Deleteit's a natural orientation but unfortunately very few understand that. i was shocked to hear the verdict but i know, india is quite a progressive nation and such verdicts will never be accepted here.
ReplyDeleteEven I have some hope left. Also, we all need to raise our voice against it. This is not a fight for homosexuals alone, it is a fight for our basic fundamental right.
DeleteI beg to differ. The SC has refused to scrap the law that prohibits sex between the same gender. There are a few issues that no one seems to see. 1) Anal sex that could lead to rectal prolapse. 2) Natural desire to not use condom which in case of anal sex can lead to a range of diseases. These issues are serious health hazards and I feel that our country is not yet equipped with that kind of awareness or precaution. Decriminalizing it would also lead to a new kind of flesh trade. As far as sexual preferences are concerned, the law also says that anal sex between man and woman is illegal and so is oral sex. It is not just an issue of one kind of sexual orientation. I m sure majority of the people don't know oral sex is illegal and I m sure no one has been prosecuted yet for the crime when it is between "consenting" individuals. Again the question arises, who will check ? There are two ways ahead. Either the country becomes aware of the hazards and these people are given counselling to avoid the "confused" individuals who think they are LGBT but are not or the law sees to it that this decriminalizing doesn't put public health at risk.
ReplyDeleteMaithili, in that case shouldn't we ban sex altogether? In all probability, more than 90% of our population doesn't use a condom and can transmit diseases.
DeleteIn that case, we should put smokers in jail because tobacco causes lung cancer.
In that case, we should put children in jail also. They consume coke that lead to obesity that in turn can cause several diseases.
Parents and schools should educate their children. A democratic state should trust their adults and provide the freedom to choose. That is how it works. Otherwise in no time we would become one Arab nation living under a veil being refused to drive or go out alone without a male counterpart.
I hope you understand.
I agree that we should not judge them for their preference but simply decriminalising is not the solution at all. Anal sex and oral sex in general is considered as an unnatural sex and this applies to every one. Suddenly everyone is associating it with LGBT. I refuse to believe that people in india do not have oral sex, then again, who can actually come and see if they are! Scraping this law is not the answer for their liberation. No one is demanding that same sex marriage be allowed. Scraping this law and not making marriage legal would be a risk because many of these people will ultimately concede to marry the opposite gender if not for lack of acceptance then for inheritance. IT is india after all! They would then become public dangers. As for smoking, that is already a law that bans smoking in public that makes it injurious to others but once again no one is going to exercise it right? That is what happens to law in India. No citizen abides by it. Smoking, spitting, crossing the railway lines, child labor,everything is banned. Parents haven't educated their children about menstruation and masturbation, do you think they will talk of gay sex? Another issue that everyone is talking is that police will target them and put them in jail if this law is not scrapped. Why would police arrest them if they are doing it in private? How will the police see what they are doing? Do not get me wrong, I m not against letting them have the right to choose their sexuality. I m just against the hue and cry made over only one act. Decriminalising is not the answer, a cumulative effect has to be seen and a new law that allows same sex marriage and an essential counselling ( like the one done before sex change operations) should be considered along with it and make it a new law altogether.
DeleteSee, anything that doesn't produce babies can be considered unnatural. So, kissing, fingering, foreplay... all unnatural. Kissing can transmit bacteria and cause disease, no? I am sure a rational person would not stand by this. Atleast I hope so.
DeleteSecondly, same sex marriage is the next step. There is a process for everything; it cannot happen in one go.
Thirdly, there is a moral police everywhere waiting to pounce on anyone who comes out in the open. Do you realise the trauma people have to go through by keeping their identity private? I, for one, have lived a dual life hiding a disease from the world for all my life only because my family thought it was the right thing to do. It is traumatic to say the least. If you cannot be yourself in public, you lead an under-confident, insecure life. And that is not what people deserve for loving someone from the same sex.
Leave everything aside, we deserve to choose whom we want to love. Being called a criminal for that choice is just not right. Just be in their shoes for sometime and imagine their plight. Even if you think decriminalizing is not the answer, it is atleast the first basic step that we really HAVE to take. Other important things related to this issue will follow. If we don't make the hue and cry now, no one will listen to us in the future. Anything that takes away our basic fundamental right in this country deserves a revolt. Who knows what they come up with next.
I have to side with Nisha here, Maithili. You don't realise the bigger implications of this. You are talking of a country with severely myopic views and which has always been under the control of the moral police.
DeleteYou are thinking way ahead when you consider being caught out for oral/anal sex. Remember all the issues where regular couples were humiliated just for being together in the park or at pubs. They were not indulging in a sexual act - just being around each other on say Valentine's day was considered a crime for the moral police.
This new law opens up another avenue to harass the regular public... now if u want to harass someone, just call up the moral police (believe me - this is done. I have personally seen it happen) and tell them u suspect so-and-so are gay so screw them. The guy need not be gay and may just be going with his friends for a movie - but he will be beaten and humiliated for 'being gay'... and noone will come to fight the moral police.
Before, a teenage couple walking around was taboo.. This law opens up avenues for goons to harass even regular ppl with threat of branding them gay to the public and their families.
Putting aside that argument also, the choice of what goes on in the bedroom - oral, anal, crazy hippo sex :) - between two consenting adults should be between them. Procreation is not the only reason for sex. Forcing someone who is gay to marry a woman just because it is the 'right thing' destroys both their lives. Why should the unsuspecting woman lose her life for nothing?
I was not expecting the right thing to happen without a fight but I was not expecting Supreme Court to reverse the ruling. I still can't believe they did this!
ReplyDelete