Thursday, August 31, 2017

The Drinking Game

I started drinking alcohol at the age of six. My dad is a regular whiskey consumer; I distinctively remember taking a sip from his glass and going eww. After that, I took a break for 10 years or so.


My next rendezvous was with a screwdriver from my brother's glass. This must be when I was 17. We were on the dance floor with a few of his friends and he offered me to drink. It is the coolest thing to have an older brother. And some cute guys for his friends whom I refused to call bhaiya!

He then offered me to buy my own whenever we went out dining sans the parents. I was not a fan and this use to be a half yearly occasion which really didn't worry an elder brother.

I made my friends have their first drink from my kitchen when we were 19 maybe. Mom was watching and it wasn't a big deal.I just knew how to mix Vodka with orange juice or Sprite. I did just that and we all had a ball in my pink room. Yes, it was always pink even till when I was 26.  The bravest thing I did was to make myself a drink once while chatting online with the Boy. I can't remember what got into me; I tiptoed into the kitchen at 1 in the night and made myself a Vodka and something. I remember washing the glass nicely before sleeping and feeling super grown-up.

On my last birthday before I got married, I got sloshed with my bestie and saw a movie. It was a laugh riot and the memory of it is still clear in my head. Oh, I think I have a blog post as well - the perks of blogging and documenting my life here since 10 years!

After marriage, drinking became a norm. It was the start of hostel life for me which I never experienced before the age of 26. I was starting to live alone with a boy and with that came weekends, clubbing, bar hopping, exploring the best pubs in town and socializing with his bachelor friends. I got drunk numerous times and had a lot of fun. Why is life more fun after a couple of drinks, I'll never understand. And yes, I never got out of control or lost my mind.

I wrote another drunk post here. Well, ummm, meh.

I am not addicted, but I also don't believe in drinking carbonated drinks without adding a certain rum/vodka in them. If I am with friends, I don't mind beer or wine. I absolutely love to drink with girls because we end up laughing so hard. This brings me to the second part of this post..

To be cont.

Tuesday, August 22, 2017

Making the Two Left Feet, Right

Have you ever gone a full 34 years of your life without going on stage and doing a little dance? Well, I have. And a ramp walk doesn't count!

My classmates and teachers were all very sweet, but the performances that we had in school required a high level of strength and stamina which I didn't showcase. So while there were concerts every second year, I either stood in a choir and sang (apparently like Michael Jackson, at least that's what the cutest Sir in school said when I sang 'Heal the World'!!) or I watched over kids from Nursery and ate from their tiffins during break time.

Did you know kids bring the tastiest meals and when you are a didi monitoring them, they can give you their life, leave alone alphabet shaped frymes. I even had my favourite kids whom I looked forward to meeting every day.

I had another friend in tow who did not perform because she had too many male admirers in school! She and I became besties and in the duration, I gathered my own share of fans.

Well, I digress.

Post school, I was too conscious. My friends and family were extra sweet and so they never pushed me hard enough to get out of my comfort zone. While I danced on every dance floor I saw, I stayed away from any place that came under public scrutiny. My steps didn't match Katrina, but when I saw Sunny Deol, my confidence went up by leaps and bounds. God bless that angel.

Marriage brought me another pair of left feet in the form of the Boy. While I lacked confidence, he didn't seem to have form. From what I can safely assume, Sunny Deol learnt from him.

Now we have a multitude of friends here in Bahrain. Some are sweet and some are crazy. The sweet ones would go out of their way to make life comfortable for us. The crazy ones, however, don't care about how pleasant all experiences are, they just want memories which can lead to all sorts of leg pulling.

On a drunken night we decided to do a funny mime dance for a friend's party. Since it was a standing performance, both me and the Boy agreed. What followed were some of the best experiences of my life.

We asked a friend to help us out who bailed at the last moment. We then devised our own dance steps which we could perform at ease. However, we were being too simple and it didn't seem to work. We looked for a cheap choreographer, and luckily found one called V.

On the first day, V came and by all means was devastated to see her disciples. While three could do whatever maneuver she did, four of us threw tantrums. The Boy even talked about walking out because he was too confused with every left, right, turn, twist, jiggle... 'I did not sign up for this,' were his exact words!!

We thought we will let fate decide and see how it goes, one day at a time. On the second day, we had come practiced and V knew what she was in for. She taught us simple, cool and funny steps and all was good with the world. We joked, we practiced, and had a lot of fun. It was just a 4-minute jig, and time seem to end pretty fast.

Me and the Boy practiced at home as well. Our confidence came with the fact that we knew all steps! He can make the cutest faces and I can just woo with my, you know, being there!

On the D-Day, we all were nervous as hell. In my gold sequence skirt I stood at the back with the Boy and hoped all to go well. The music started and there was a lot of hooting. Bringing on the Kala Chashma brought more cheers. I just forgot one step. I did not fall (the Boy had a back up plan for that, he said he will start doing Naagin dance if I did fall!).

People came up to me and praised the Boy's cute expressions and my skirt. I told you, I woo by just being there!

I can't think of a better experience. From absolutely zero confidence, to attaining at least some of it, we went a long way in the last week. I thought of the many moments of feeling rejected in school. When we grow up, we can be whatever we want to be. We have a judgmental society that stops us from doing what we love, but that should not stop us. For all you know, that society is unsure of its own strengths and weaknesses and applauds you for your bravery. I can vouch for this because I saw people with confidence crumple a tad under pressure.

And these crazy friends, keep them close. They can make you do things you never thought you could do. They balance the hot and sweet in your life, they bring equilibrium to madness and sanity, they dig you out from your shell pretending nothing is wrong. You think they don't understand you, but they do, in a whole different way. They have that unique ability to change the next 34 years of your life for you.

Like they did for me.

I know, the skirt. The right side even had a slit!
The dance picture has others, and I am not authorized to post!

Tuesday, August 15, 2017

Hello 2017!

It has been 8 months into 2017, and today is the first day I feel really good about everything. It might change tomorrow because history has proved me wrong time and again, but I am not going to let that change anything about today. Lots happened this year that made me a stronger, better person. Life's lessons, health lessons and personal growth - all at once!

When they say health is wealth, they are not lying. You can buy everything your heart desires, you can own a house, a luxury car or go to exotic destinations in first class, but if your body is not feeling good, you will not be happy in the true sense of the word. We do try to ignore our problems because, well, you can't be brooding over things that can't change, but our heart never feels in the right place. Wealth does help us to cover up our problems and give us temporary relief, but it cannot give us peace.

Oh, too many buts in those two paragraphs!

So I took a weight loss package in the beginning of this year because I have been recommended to lose some kilos by doctors. I did really well and felt proud. However, the plan backfired and with losing weight, I lost a lot of strength. I traveled to India alone and had my worst day when I could not even walk at an outing. It was the lowest low in my life and I was shaken to the very core. I feared my present and the future and did not know what to do.

Like everything wrong that has ever happened, I thought that this too shall pass. I tried various things that I have tried in the past but they did not seem to work. I really thought it will never change. In June, we went for a vacation and nothing felt right. It was a beautiful place, I was in good company, the plans worked great, still, I was not cheerful at all.

I came back and met a few doctors. I went online and researched whatever I could. I even made friends with people who seemingly had my condition. I spoke to my friends for encouragement. I spoke to my doctor relatives who spoke to specialists. I saw YouTube videos of conferences held for similar diseases. It was panic and a great deal of it!

To say that I was feeling low would be an understatement. No one knows about it though. Yes, there are things I didn't do. I didn't give up. I didn't not smile in public. I didn't stop enjoying life the way I should be.

Only lately I found a physiotherapist who seems to understand me. Just four sessions with her and I feel better, partly because she told me that I look like a 23-24 year old! Ya, well, I agree.

Now, like I said, history has proved me wrong time and again. That will and should not let me not be happy. There are a few things I fear, yet there are a thousand things I am grateful for. To be honest, it is this gratitude that has kept me going. I do my pranayaam in the morning and thank God for every small thing. Even in these hard times I did not ask for anything because I know it is not about that. Strength comes from believing in yourself and staying positive. Gratitude keeps me positive.

I've not written much this year, I really don't feel like it. Lets hope this will change as well. I haven't even written about my trip to Croatia and Slovenia because of all the lull surrounding it and it depresses me when I think about how I felt there. I have 4 trips lined up for this year and finally I am looking forward to them. There is something else also that I would share in the next post. It is going to be awesome, for me at least!

Until next time, keep smiling and never give up. That keeps you awesome and helps you look like a 23 year old forever.

P.S. I took my first step into middle age yesterday, had to put henna in my hair to hide the white strands. Oh, I look 23 despite that, just FYI.

P.P.S Did I tell you I love my new therapist?