Whisker Woes!

This post is a part of the 'Shave or Crave' movement in association with BlogAdda.com

Stubble, Stubble go away,

Come again the next day.

How to keep these evening whiskers at bay,

This is what my years of experience has to say:

If you drool at other men, it will never work,

Forget about a clean shaven kiss, you’ll get his smirk.

If you tell him he looks old, it won’t hurt his pride,

For Darling, he thinks it’s not how you look, it’s what you feel inside!

‘I won’t wax if you don’t shave’ will defeat your cause,

You love your little black dress – he knows that Boss.

Try comparing him with Santa, a furry animal or a woodsy guy,

He’ll wait till you start PMS’ing and give you an apt reply.

Hypnotherapy tape that repeats ‘I will shave every evening’ can have repercussions,

Once in a while you will hate these daily compulsions.

Trading with a massage or a pedicure won’t force him to shave,

He’ll avail his special offers smartly, all you will do is Crave!

Use your brains, play with his mind,

Don’t hurt his ego, be extra kind.

Psychology works wonders, do what Pavlov did,

Be patient with Conditioning, I do not kid.

Pavlov who? To cut the useful Psychology lesson short -

If he shaves in the evening, show Him your full support.

Even if it means his favourite meal, a boy’s night, some passionate kissing,

Or an extra peg, a neck massage, a good loving.

Keep your goodies ready whenever he shaves in the evening,

Don’t mention your plan, just keep him guessing.

After a while he will notice a behavioral pattern in you,

That is, Evening shave = fun, Stubble = nothing new!

Keep the goodies coming as you see the stubble fade away,

How long will this take? Depends on you Babay!

Mutual love and affection doesn’t hurt anyone,

When you do things for each other – the fun has just begun!

How can I be so sure? - you may ask,

I've been doing this for a while and it's hardly a task.

I crave for the smoothness, he loves to feel special,

Simply being nice is what makes this life Magical! 

Fond Friday 'F'ilosophies

Belief

Faith

Attitude

Wish 

Truth

Sometimes, all it takes is a beautiful thought to express how you feel and who you are.

Movie Review - Dabangg 2

One of the best things about living in the Middle East is that you get to watch Bollywood flicks on Thursday. And some enthusiastic cutlets watch and write the review as soon as they come home!

So, anyway, I was excited from the word go. The mere presence of Salman Khan on the screen is a treat. I don't know when and how Salman came to this level, but he's pretty darn good! In his introductory scene, Chulbul Pandey saves a young boy from the goons. There was nothing special about the act. Yet you love every moment of it because of Salman Khan!

The entire movie is set in Kanpur. It's the usual chor-police saga with songs and action sequences thrown in at regular intervals. There are quite a few funny dialogues that can make you roll on the floor. Salman’s expressions are yet again unbeatable and he keeps you on the edge of your seat.

The story isn’t great. I missed the handsome villain from last time. Even the action sequences and dialogues of the previous film were better. Arbaz Khan hardly has a role this time. Sonakshi Sinha sucked. She is forever angry in the film! I wish someone else did 'Fevicol se' instead of Kareena - it just didn't suit her personality. The title song, however, has awesome choreography. There are a few funny scenes between Salman and Vinod Khanna that are loads of fun too.

It’s quite unbelievable that despite everything falling flat, I loved watching the movie. It’s all Salman Khan and his antics. If you’re not into him, there is nothing to look forward to. If you love him like I do, you will be smiling throughout and would yearn for Dabangg 3. Take your call. (And for your benefit, I'd hope you watch the movie!)

P.S. Funny moment from the movie:
Salman (pointing to a jar): Ye kya hai?
Man at the counter: Gulab Jamun
Salman (speaking to a cop): Gulab Jamun se yaad aaya, tumhari ma ka hernia operation theek se ho gaya?


P.P.S: My story That one Phone Call is on Indiblogger now. To take it further I need loads of good wishes and some votes. Please click here and press on the red heart. You will be showered with God's love thereafter - I promise!

That one Phone Call: My entry for the Get Published contest

The Idea:

Tick tock, tick tick tock, tick tock tock tick – that’s how his clock, sorry, heart beats when he sees her. Still: after 6 years of getting married and 2 kids within 2 years! But that story is for a separate book on contraceptives. This one is about how he waited (read: stalked) for 10 glorious years of his life till she finally understood what we had witnessed for the longest time.

It was love at first sight for Aditya at sweet sixteen. He was this wide-eyed boy from Nainital who still hadn’t got his hands on ‘1001 ways to tell a girl I Love You’. Being a nerd who cracked JEE later in life didn’t help either. And so, Meera was unaware of his unrequited love for a long, long time. Lots of twists happened in a decade but one thing that remained constant was Aditya’s abiding love for Meera. 

It was nothing but fate that brought together all the twisted pieces of their love story into one concrete picture. Their story makes me believe that Bollywood concoctions don’t come out of thin air. It makes me realise that even though we live in the age of instant messaging, it can take a lifetime for a message to travel from a person’s head to his heart. It reassures me that for every bad guy in this world there are a hundred gentlemen who would go to any extent to prove their love and commitment.

The when, where, why, and how of this most-interesting-love-story I have ever known has chapters of its own. Their rollercoaster ride has sent many men on a guilt trip and women on an ‘aww’ spree!  To witness ‘his’ love story turn into ‘their’ legend keep a tab on Harper Collins publications.

Extract:

“It’s ok if she’s getting married. I’m sure you have stocked enough Old Monk and Rafi songs for this slap-on-the-face occasion as well,” Sumit was saying on the phone.

“You have a heart made of stone,” I roared pulling the phone from him.

“Meera is getting married? To whom? And why?” I asked lowering my tone as I heard Aditya's voice choking on the other side. 

 “She’s getting married to her boyfriend. That will probably put an end to my love story,” Aditya replied. Since I didn’t use the C-word in every sentence, he felt more comfortable in sharing his feelings with me than his closest buddy from college.

“…and make you the most coveted Devdas of the 21^st century,” Sumit commented from behind.

                        

This is my entry for the HarperCollins–IndiBlogger Get Published contest, which is run with inputs from Yashodhara Lal and HarperCollins India. 

P.S. If you would like to see this story in print, please press on the red heart HERE! Thanks a ton!

Tid Bits from the Trip!

I have a major rant coming up next. But before that I want to share some light moments with the world - these are special bytes from the trip.

** So my 14 year old cousin laughs less and says LOL more. Ye aajkal ke bache! I showed her some songs on my playlist and thought I was enlightening her. She rejected all of them blatantly and called them so last yearish. She even knew each and every word of every English song. And I thought the lyrics of new songs were useless. Guess we are last generation now, or is it just me? Any which way, I prefer to laugh than lol!

** I had a near death experience on the beach. I was taken in by the waves (I can hear my cousin say LOL). I was out in a fraction of a second. But it was enough for me to be scared for the rest of the trip. 

** It was my birthday and I was on Calangute beach. Since it had disgusting men around, I settled myself on a beach bed and let the Boy go swim in the water. Suddenly an unruly man came to take my picture. I waved at him with a WTF expression. The shack guys grabbed him and handed him over to the police. They tortured him for more than an hour. I was bemused and impressed.

A similar thing happened with a few girls in an airport shuttle. It was an Angrez this time. They gladly posed for him. We have such double standards!

** Jab Tak Hain Jaan sucked. Sorry Yash Chopra, I will remember you for any other film but this. If I love someone and someone loves me, why the hell will I pray that I will never see him again if God kept him alive. And after having a near death experience once, I will definitely take care on the road. And amnesia is so selective in Bollywood. I can go on and on…

**I’m a born Juari. I can play cards even in my sleep. Give me any game and I will get addicted. It’s in my Sindhi genes. I was proud to see most people speak in Sindhi at the most famous casino in Goa. First day I won. Second day I lost. Third day I came to a no-gain, no-loss position. Now thats what I call paisa wasool. The Boy was bored the whole time. These Punjabis I tell you, only like Tandoori chicken and Beer.

**There was an Arabic guy and a British girl in a particular trip that we took. They looked like they were 16-17 year olds. They kept locking lips with all possible sounds all through the journey which took around 4 hours. Why is it more interesting to see such scenes in India!? Cheap, cheap, cheap!! 

**My six year old niece sang ‘Chanda hai tu’ on stage for my 1 year old nephew on his 1^st birthday in front of a crowd of nearly 600 people. It was ethereal. She forgot a few words in between. Next day when I was alone with her, she asked me why is everyone saying I sang very well when I did not?

I really can’t tell you how much I love her and her sweetness. And when I was leaving on 30^th November, she asked me to come back on 1^st December. I’m so glad the love is mutual!

Surround yourself with such love people, there is no space for anything less than that. Adios!

The Hangover

It’s been three days since I got back from India. But the hangover remains. The trip was so awesome that I didn’t feel like coming back. I’m still sulking and so I’ll let pictures speak a thousand words!

I love the colors from a plane's window. Especially if it's sunset or sunrise time. They bring out the poet in me ;)

On first day of our trip to Goa we went to Calangute Beach. It was so crowded that I couldn't enjoy. Next day we went to Morjim. This was Paradise :)

Now who has a sick mind like that? We do!!!

View from Brittos.

My surprise birthday cake!

That's my nephew submerged in gift wrappers. His birthday was awesome fun.

This is me and the Boy!! The nephew's birthday party was grand and this is a sneak peak :)

I hope I get back to reality soon. Some trips are too good to be true, this was one of them!

P.S. I can't reply or post comments in the comments section. Is there a bug on Blogspot??