The Great Indian Litterbug

This poem is a part of Happy Hour contest on IndiBlogger sponsored by The Times of India. Bloggers have to give a humorous take on the Great Indian Litterbug.

I live in a huge mansion,

Have bathrooms in all 5 rooms.

For its care, I have 5 servants,

Who clean with Dettol and mop with imported brooms.

When you walk outside, you see a beautiful garden,

Filled with beautiful plants in a prim and proper state.

And where do I throw my garbage?

Ofcourse, right opposite my gate!

I drive a beautiful black Mercedes,

That I’ve bought with my hard earned money.

I take it for long drives,

And a few trips with my family.

I clean it every second day,

With polish that I’ve bought from abroad.

And when we all travel in it, where do we throw the chocolate wrappers?

Ofcourse, right on the road!

My office is my temple,

I work there everyday.

You can say anything to me,

But to my workplace? – nay!

I light an agarbatti there every morning,

I have a dustbin there too.

And where do I stick the chewing gum?

Ofcourse, right under the desk that’s new!

I go to the best school,

The fees is the highest in the city.

The teachers are the best in town,

Oh, and the girls are also pretty!

The students there do really well,

They get into the best colleges later on.

And where do I throw the used papers?

Ofcourse, right on the campus lawn!

My aunt’s daughter had a destination wedding.

We all wore Manish Malhotra’s dresses.

The crowd was top notch,

Several people came from foreign places.

They hired the best decorators,

Food was tasty too.

And where did they throw the leftovers?

Ofcourse, right outside the venue!

I am very rich,

You don’t know who I am.

I have a truck load of money,

It’s absolutely true, not just any sham.

I don’t spend all on myself,

I do charity too.

And where do I spit my paan

Ofcourse, on the road, which by the way, I paid tax for too!

That’s the mentality we all carry,

‘The government should hire cleaners’

Who should walk with brooms behind us,

When we travel in our Beamers.

We would spend money on everything we need,

We will even spend lakhs on unnecessary things.

And where do we become a miser?

Ofcourse, on garbage cans, right where it stinks.

We are all Great Indian Litterbugs,

The poor, the rich, and the filthy rich.

But I feel more for the ones with big pockets,

And the educated ones – those are the ones who itch.

We will go for satsangs,

And give gyaan to everyone around us

And where do we throw our own garbage?

Ofcourse, just about anywhere, despite the special 'status'!