What is up?

I get freaked out when someone meets and greets with a ‘wasssup?’ I know I’m always suppose to say ‘Nothing much, you tell me?’ in the same super-excited tone. But really, why ‘wassup’ at all. What's wrong with the good old 'Hello, how are you?' So, wassup you asked? Let me tell you what I really want to say -

**I don’t have many Indian neighbours. And it’s tough to get along with firangs. You know, we don’t have much in common. So when I heard an Indian couple had moved in the building, I got excited. Maybe they were cool like us? (*winks*) So like that, I went and rang the doorbell. I heard the sound of trinkets. I wanted to run away but it was too late. A sweet girl in 7^th month of pregnancy opened the door. My dreams were shattered. I don’t get along too well with most mothers, nothing personal, but some of them just talk about their babies, and I’m really not that interested!

So she talked and talked and talked in a Bihari accent. She’s so sweet and innocent that she doesn’t walk much because of the fact that she has a habit of falling. Ya, me too had wider eyes looking at her condition! Anyway, the first thing the Boy asked me was, ‘What do say when they open the door’? Adventure trips, I tell you!

**We live in a country which is famous for its notorious activities where akeli ladki is like khuli tijori! So much so, that we have people coming from neighbouring countries to spend their weekends here. One weekend we went to this pub which had hordes of young men looking for pretty damsels. There was a huge table and we took two seats. Three other men came and joined us. Now the Boy had to go and get drinks. He asked me if I would be comfortable sitting alone. It was a tough question. I realised I was 29 and I had to handle these things now! So off he went and I set my eyes on my cell phone. He took good 15 minutes which seemed like eternity. Anway, one man patted my knee. I could have collapsed. Without a word in the noisy pub, I shook my head and pointed to the Boy at the bar. The man could have easily rolled on the floor laughing! Instead, he shook his head and asked if his friend would be able to convince the three girls on the other table to have drinks with them. They had a bet and he was just doing some sweet talk. I should have been embarrassed, but surprisingly we had a great time after that!

**The Boy will be going to another country for some project work next week. I have already been there and so I decided to stay back. I calculated the amount that we will be spending on my ticket and visa. I decided to spend that money on shopping instead. Isn’t that a wiser decision? I’m so ready for 30!

**Speaking of 30, I had set a few goals for myself. And I’m glad I’ve been successful. This has been one of the most satisfying years. Hopefully, I will continue to ‘grow’. The good news is, I’ll be spending my 30^th in Goa. So much for being a good girl!

There is so much more, but I’ll stop right here. Next time, someone asks ‘wassup’, I’ll start my harangue. How would that be to stop the epidemic?